Sunday, February 12, 2012

A Confession and a Theory

I have a confession to make: I am not really a light. I just saw that a lot of people were calling themselves lights and I wanted to belong. I am sorry for the deception.

And now I shall share with you my theory on the true nature of Slender Man.

It's obvious when you think about it: The Runners: What trait is common among them? What is the thread that connected them all since before the Slender Man even started stalking them? Think carefully, I'm sure you'll notice it, what with their Kingdom Hearts references and their Doctor Who jokes and their Shinn Asuka avatars...

That's right, Runners are nerds.

Or geeks, depending on how you define these terms. I have no intention of starting that argument.

Anyway, this fact leads us to one inevitable conclusion: The Slender Man is a jock, hunting down and picking on the nerds. Judging by his body type, I'd say he's most likely a basketball player.

So there you have it: The TRUE nature of Slender Man revealed.

Also: I really like to use colons.


  1. a basketball player? noooooo!

    he must have been one of those thugs that were up to no good in my neighborhood! and that's why my aunt viv and uncle phil tried to sacrifice me to him!

  2. Colons?
    ... Having some problems with the old digestion there, mate?